I’ve wasted so much time and energy on trying to fit in and please people.
One of the most self-sabotaging things I’ve done (in my unconscious pursuit to being liked) was to keep my mouth shut.
The safer option was to refrain from expressing how I truly felt or what I really thought. A part of me felt that I had to hide certain aspects of myself to avoid rejection. E.g. Instead of saying “I’m really upset or angry” or “No”, I would say “Of course it’s okay” or “yes”.
Does this sound familiar?
This approach sounds harmful, right?
Harmful to others (to some extent), but the consequences are devastating within you.
What did not expressing bring me?
It created a massive discord between who I really am and the person I am pretending to be.
Every time I did this, I moved more out of alignment with my Higher Self.
Every time I chose not to express, I added oil to the burning internal war and prison within.
Sadly, what you say can’t own you.
The subconscious is a depository of all our unexpressed emotions. Thus, all the emotions you don’t release, go there. When we express an emotion, it naturally releases into awareness where you can work with it.
Not expressing or addressing emotions will take control of your life.
Like Carl Jung said:
“Until you make the subconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”Carl Jung
Our reason(s) for not expressing might be different for all of us (E.g. fear of rejection, fear of being vulnerable, fear of being disliked, not trusting yourself etc), but to avoid this internal war within, you will have to be honest with yourself.
What is behind your fear of not expressing?
Is living in this fear worth the consequences within?